I feel like i am recovering from surgery but im not sick … which is why this is such a mind fuck, if i had a cut sew it cover it it heals ….. a broken bone you can see it and feel it … But this its invisable …. its cells they could be growing right now ……….

now this radio therapy its gonna make poorly/sick to cure me , but as i dont feel like i need a cure it seem daft to do it i mean who would choose to do it if you didnt have to….


how im feeling

well you get the idea that how i think … its that on a constant loop…. if it wasnt for E i would be more of a stuck record …

I hope i am not moaning – rambling i am ok with but i dont want to comr across as moaning. I have before if this in any way helps some one it get that persistant ulser checked by the dentist………… just incase

as for me, baring the failure that was yesterday… improvements everyday, im stronger (feel like breaking into beyonce song lol)